Some people, it seems, were not really made to enjoy life at sea. We’ve all met them: moaning at the waiters, ranting at the staff on the purser’s desk, giving the cabin stewards hell.
But what happens when these unhappy characters unleash their venom on fellow passengers? Well, some of them end up as figures of fun – and horror – on the Cruise Critic forums. Here’s a motley selection from a particularly splendid thread started by member nhcruiser and gathering pace: Ultimate Cruise Snobs.
Some cruisers-from-hell start young. Member Paradiseisaprincessaway recalls sitting in the hot tub on deck with a friend and a young child. “We were just chatting between ourselves and the kid piped up and said to us ‘You two will be old ladies before you even get close to the status that I have and I’m only 11. I’m Elite on Princess. You will never get that.’”
Member Chrysalis tells the story of a cringe-worthy encounter in the lift. “It was formal night and we decided that we would not dress up and that we could eat in the Caribe Café [the ship’s casual buffet]. On the way back from eating our elevator stopped and two formally dressed up couples got on.
“They did not say a word until they reached their deck. Before exiting the elevator, the one lady turned around and very sarcastically said, ‘Well, I guess you were not invited to have cocktails with the Captain tonight like we were!’” (Let’s not forget that everybody is invited to the Captain’s cocktails on formal night.)
Some cruisers are practically delusional about cabin categories. Member Swedish_weave writes: “At lunch, a lady at the next table started a very pleasant conversation with us until she asked what suite we were in. When I told her we were booked in an inside cabin, she let out a very audible ‘HMMMPH’ and turned away and didn’t speak to us again.”
While Love.II.Cruise met a ‘gentleman’ on an Oceania ship who was appalled that there weren’t different restaurants and lounges for different classes of passengers. “He didn’t want to associate with people staying in inside, window or balcony categories. He claimed he was very well travelled after letting everyone know how rich he was. Then at the bar he said he had never had a Margarita on the rocks with a salted rim, so he ordered one and we had to teach him how to drink it.”
Others have obviously been watching too many period dramas in which the servants have a separate entrance. JEM4205 says, “How about the ‘lady’ who loudly complained that the ship’s crew were using the same gangway as the Elite passengers?”
And others just think they’re the only passenger on board. Member Skf remembers a ‘lady’ in a wheelchair. “The elevator arrived full and she DEMANDED that people get off to make room for Her Royal Highness.”
Have you encountered an ultimate cruise snob? Now’s your chance for revenge: Tell us about it.
Cruise ship etiquette: get the low-down on the ultimate dos and don’ts onboard.